Tracking My Internet Addiction

 Today was decent, not as good as the 11th, but what are you gonna do, you know? Reddit:  Just a few targeted searches. I am finding myself to have a "better relationship" with this site when I'm not constantly checking headlines.  Instagram:   I forgot that I actually deleted the app. That's why I hadn't been on! Let's keep it going LOL Youtube:  Unfortunately, I was watching this youtuber I kinda like for a bit long in the morning. Just lying on the couch. I finally caught myself and got up to do something a little more productive. Shuffled through a couple shorts as well, but caught myself early enough. One source of the browsing might be boredom; brain wants dopamine, brain tries to go to "usual suspects," then you spend too much time and feel bad, cycle continues. It's not enough to just  not  go on the sites, but you have to actually be doing something else to replace it (which I'm thinking should be things you  want  to do). Enjoy...

 Today was a good day regarding my parameters. Reddit:  Did a targeted search twice and did not browse any subreddit / the popular page. Instagram:  Did not open once Youtube:  Okay I caught my self watching a short, but then cut it off. It was early in the morning (didn't move my phone away from the bed like a should have). Still overall a good day. Let's keep it up. 

Okay since I literally just started this blog on this day at 1:49pm, I of course did not adhere to my outline in the intro post LOL. But we're not here to shame, just track. The goal is to get better each day. I'm noticing that when I wake up early, I tend to go to the phone more. I think I need to move my charger to, at least, the other side of the room so that I can't easily grab it. I need just enjoy the silence/try to get more sleep. Perhaps a temporary alternative is move the phone, keep the headphones nearby, so I can just be stuck with whatever was last playing and listen to that. Again, just temporarily. We'll try to slowly ween off that. Reddit:  Just randomly scrolled for a bit, saw all the terrible stuff going on this country as usual. Checked and rechecked my "usual subs" even though I know nothing's going on. It's just reading the same headlines I saw yesterday with the same comments about nothing. Like why do I keep going back, you know? ...

Generally, I'm an anxious and stressed out person. Over the years, I learned how to mostly manage it, but recently, I feel like it's gotten to be a bit much again. I think it's safe to say it's related to how much time I spend online (or thinking about things related to being online). All the classic symptoms - constantly needing to check the phone, occasionally getting lost on Instagram Reels/Youtube Shorts/scrolling through Reddit, experiencing the constant micro emotional changes that the above bring about, reduced focus, forgetfulness, the need for reassurance in all my decisions, and  the inability to think for myself  (I'll include lack of critical thinking with this as well). Regardless of the label (addicted, obsessed, etc.), it's clear that I feel like I have a bad relationship with the internet, and it's finally time I  do  something about it. Now obviously, I've known for a while, but taking action and wanting to take action are different. The...